Mental Health Day 2023: My one-year sobriety journey
As we mark Mental Health Day 2023, allow me to share a personal milestone that coincides with this important event – my one-year sobriety journey.
The Turning Point
I woke up, strolled to the fridge, and cracked open the last standing ice-cold, large bottle of Peroni. I took a generous sip, raised it to eye level, gave it one final nod of acknowledgement, and downed it. It was 6 a.m. on a typical working Monday. That marked the end of my alcoholic journey for the next year and counting.
Even though I had been drinking excessively at all hours of the day, I managed to maintain a high level of functionality. But inside, my mind was a mess. Anxiety, panic attacks, a perpetually foggy head, and a heart that raced like a Formula 1 car were my daily companions. It was clear that I needed to make some fundamental changes. I owed it to myself, and most importantly, I owed it to my young son.
The initial two weeks were the toughest. It felt like if I slipped up and had a drink, I hadn't invested much time, and I could always try again next Monday. However, when I reached the 30-day mark, I never looked back. I had invested enough time that starting again would be a significant setback. By day 60, the benefits were really starting to show, so it stopped being about the days of sobriety and became more about self-improvement. Sobriety became a way of life, and my focus shifted from not drinking to dealing with the realities of a sober existence.
Sobriety became a way of life, and my focus shifted from not drinking to dealing with the realities of a sober existence.
The Benefits of Sobriety:
Freedom from Anxiety and Panic Attacks: Sobriety has granted me the gift of mental peace. No longer do I battle anxiety and panic attacks that once clouded my days. I am able to make plans and meet with friends without being surrounded by the constant cloud of anxiety that was preventing me from doing something as basic as leaving home and enjoying time with friends and family.
Improved Sleep: I still struggle with my sleep now but for completely different reasons (there is always something, right?) but it is undeniable that when I do manage to get an eye shut it is a restful sleep.
Enhanced Physical Well-being: Sobriety has resulted in feeling less bloated in general and experiencing stable weight (including some loss!), along with more energy and improved oxygen levels (most likely due to being more physically active but being sober has allowed for that so I am counting it here).
Quality Relationships: My now fewer relationships (more on that later) have thrived, and I now find myself surrounded by better-quality relationships.
Financial Gain: Sobriety has saved me not only from the financial burden of alcohol but also from the poor choices it often led me to make.
Healthier Cravings: Sobriety has reduced my cravings for unhealthy food and has allowed me to make better meal choices.
Stabilised Heart Rate: No more sudden rushes and spikes in my heart rate. I have actually lowered my resting heart rate quite considerably.
Becoming a Better Parent: all those benefits combined have allowed me to achieve the most important goal which is that I have become a better and more engaged father.
My son deserves the best version of me, and sobriety has allowed me to be just that.
Now, remember, I leapt out of the drinking party plane into the world of sobriety without a parachute. I did no prep – I just knew I had to do it right then and there. Because if I didn't, it was never going to happen. But here's the kicker: I soon discovered that the real challenge wasn't giving up alcohol but facing reality with a clear head. That was quite a shock to the system that required a lot of work on my part.
The Challenges of Sobriety:
Social Transition: Moving into a sober lifestyle can be quite a challenge, and it might mean parting ways with some friendships (whether some of those were genuine friendships is a tale for another day). It's a genuine adjustment that demands resilience. Losing the familiarity and sources of support (real or not) can be tough, especially for someone grappling with additional mental health issues and difficult life events.
Changing Mindset: Shaking off the habit of seeking rewards in alcohol after work or when completing personal tasks calls for a significant shift in mindset and discipline. The constant quest for that reward forced me to find a suitable replacement to keep my mind engaged. So, I started filling all my newfound time (there is so much more time!) by spending it with my son whenever possible or revisiting old hobbies like photography and video games.
Facing Reality: Without even questioning it, alcohol had become a way of life for me; I wouldn't go anywhere if there weren't drinks involved. Living in sobriety can initially feel incredibly overwhelming, and there were moments when I lost a sense of self. In the beginning, the cravings for alcohol and comfort calories were relentless. Also, spending time with people who you now realise you don't actually enjoy being around can be quite jarring. I find that the effort needed to shed these behaviours is directly proportional to how much of your life was entwined with drinking.
Rediscovering Life
Sobriety has opened up new horizons. I now have more time for my son, photography, and outdoor adventures. I'm present, unleashed from the constraints of alcohol.
Even though I always kept my drinking in check when I was with my son, sticking to just one or two beers, tops, there were still some clear benefits, no more hangovers, and I'm not constantly feeling wiped out. I'm not just more mentally and physically present; I've also got the energy to enjoy those long days of outdoor activities with him.
I don't judge those who drink. I am fully aware that we are all on different journeys and I've had my share of boozy adventures which I would do all over again without a doubt. However, I did take it too far so I am grateful that for me, sobriety has become the path to mental health, inner peace, and being the father my son deserves. I have no doubt that without change, anxiety would have been the end of me.
Reach Out for Help
If you are struggling with any addiction or If you're considering sobriety to improve your mental and physical well-being, know that you're not alone. Feel free to reach out to me if you have any questions about my journey or if there is anything I can share to help you get started.
Mental health is not just a single day or week of the year, it is a lifelong constant journey, just like physical health. Seek support from resources like Employee Assistance Programmes or your HR team if you feel you need that extra bit of support.
Let's make every day a day for mental health, and let's keep supporting each other at whichever point you are on your path to achieving mental health and inner peace.
Thank you for reading my story, it means a lot to be able to share this milestone with you all! 😃
Here is the NHS website with Mental Health wellbeing tips:
